Let’s get something straight: synthetic diamonds are fake by name and definition. They may contain the same materials and similar qualities as a natural diamond, but they are absolutely not the same. A natural diamond boasts age and energy, resulting from millions, and in some cases, billions of years of geological conditions. A scientist can try to mimic these conditions in a labratory, but they can never recreate the essence of a natural diamond. There is nothing romantic or special about a rock formed in a lab, and these rocks hold no real value as there is potential to create an endless supply. Not to mention, producing synthetic diamonds requires huge quantities of energy. True diamond lovers understand that synthetics are not the future. The very fact that companies are investing in the production of synthetics signals the shortage of natural diamonds, and hence, their inherent value.
The death of Karl Lagerfeld this morning is an unspeakable loss for fashion and the creative universe. The houses of Chanel and Fendi will never be the same. Karl Lagerfeld was truly iconic in every sense. There was a mystique behind everything he designed and created. He revived the House of Chanel, making it relevant and youthful. He reinterpreted Coco Chanel’s use of tweed and made every girl dream of owning a Chanel little black dress and jacket. His Chanel brides were the most anticipated part of Paris Haute Couture Week. Chanel will forever be synonymous with Karl and his vision. At Fendi, he made lustworthy and wearable fun fur and produced a memorable Haute Couture show at The Trevi Fountain in Rome. It’s hard to imagine a world without Karl Lagerfeld and his wit. RIP.
If the late Master himself, Azzedine Alaia, is rolling in his grave, it might be because his company is rereleasing all his old designs in a desperate and depressing bid to make money. Or it is possible it’s entirely my fault. For only I would be ridiculous enough to alter one of his perfect frocks with a pair of kitchen shears. That’s right, I decided my bodycon Alaia was in need of a makeover and I couldn’t bother to take it to a professional seamstress. I needed instant gratification! Instead of letting a professional handle it, I rifled through my cluttered kitchen drawer and pulled out the same pair of scissors I used the previous day to cut the ribbon off a rotisserie chicken and I went to work. The result: my once sophisticated knee-length navy and burgundy dress is now a sexy minidress. And I couldn’t be happier. Je suis tres desole, Monsieur Alaia.
There is no single article of clothing I love more than a warm winter coat, but when I moved to Miami I said farewell to my beloved outerwear collection, save for a few light capes. I now live vicariously through fashion influencers in cold climates and feel a twang of jealousy whenever they layer coats and scarves. Meanwhile, Miami boutiques sell some of the most beautiful shearlings and furs in the world and all I can do is lust for them in silence. One coat I am most certainly not lusting over is the Max Mara Teddy Bear coat. I cannot, for the life of me, understand the fuss over this shapeless mess of a coat. It’s quite possibly the least flattering coat ever produced and makes me wonder when dressing like Fozzy Bear or any other muppet became a fashion goal. Seriously, did Max Mara get a deal on shag carpets because there is no other viable explanation for this thing? Aside from its inherent functionality, the Teddy Bear coat has nothing to offer. With a hefty $3,590 pricetag, this coat tops my list as the absolute worst winter trend. Instead of dressing like a lumpy potato sack, let’s band together in insisting on only flattering, fitted coats because my stomach is lurching all the way from Miami.
Not to be outdone by the Chinese concept of Feng Shui, the Japanese have their own method for decluttering, known as Danshari. Danshari is essentially the cure for materialism, teaching us to purge and live a minimalist lifestyle. With all due respect to the Japanese, no thank you. We may be a melting pot, but most Americans simply do not possess the DNA for the simple life. We are forever chasing the American Dream and that includes owning a lot of really cool shit. Heck, even the Amish provide their daughters a wedding dowry to make them more enticing and surely two cows are better than one? My point is, the Western World is one of consumerism, and what better thing to “consume” and reap the fruits of our labor than diamonds? Diamonds are the ultimate status symbol. If you must declutter and Feng Shui your house, start by taking your old clothes to a consignment shop and selling your old gold and jewelry to make room for new jewelry. Citrine apparently attracts wealth, so scatter some citrine in the money corner and pray it turns into diamonds. And while you’re at it, you better move your trashcan and dead plants out of the money corner immediately!